xmutanthigh | [OPEN POST] NEW BRO'HOOD

[This far into the game, and Kevin still doesn't doubt those words. Even if the school doesn't reject him outright, it's too dangerous for him to be around people he cares about, and that's why he needs to leave. Distance himself from them. On that point, he agrees with Mystique. It doesn't hurt him anymore; it's just a facet of life he's now accepted. It started with his dad, and it has to end now before any more lives are gone because of him.

He simply maintains eye contact with Mystique and speaks clearly.]

I want...

[His control is far beyond what it was months ago. He is confident. He brings around his bare hand and places only his index finger onto Mystique's hands on the gun.]

I want you to let go.

[Only a small amount of decay occurs, causing Mystique to gasp in surprise and reflexively drop the gun onto the snow. Kevin bursts into movement in an instant, kicking the gun back towards John, then raises his hands to fight Mystique if necessary.]

[John reacts instantly, pushing Kitty off him and ignoring the tremors of pain branching up his fingers and wrist and forearm. His good hand swipes for the gun in the air and he only fucking prays (which is saying a lot, since John doesn't believe in shit) that's Kitty's paying enough attention to take that cue.

He feels a grim sort of elation that his fingers close around the gun - he aims at Mystique and shoots her in the torso without a second's hesitation, letting out a rattling, victorious breath, his voice pained from his injuries and yet still with bite.]

If only that could make you shut the fuck up too.

[Kitty's grip loosens the moment it becomes clear what John's about to do, unphasing him so he can carry the job through. The neutralizer's release makes her flinch, but she can't find any pity for Mystique, not right now. She's manipulative and dangerous, she would have killed John and likely the rest of them too - it's all Kitty sees.

Even so, she looks away when the dart sinks in, almost afraid of the scene to ensue, afraid she might find something worth pitying on Mystique's face. Kitty replaces her grasp on John's arm almost immediately without hesitation, ready to protect again if need be.]

[The cry of agony that escapes Raven is something ripped from the fabric of her soul, and there is no doubt in anyone's mind that Mystique, the magnificent metamorph, is dying. The deep blue of her skin shimmers, each cell spasming through the different forms they've taken on: Magneto, Kitty Pryde, Wolverine, and so on. Her voice shifts tenors as she vocalizes her pain and despair in a long, low howl: a chorus uncounted, combined into one.

She drops to her knees before Kevin, looking up at him pleadingly, sure that this time she will surely lose her gift forever. Her fingers reach up, trembling, pink flesh so vulnerable, so fragile, just brushing the bare skin of Kevin's right hand.]

Kill me. Please. [She begs, desperate, her agility and strength still accessible, she could grip his exposed flesh tight and ride the waste into death, if only her will could overcome the harrowing emptiness she feels now, unable to shift and change forms.] Have mercy; don't make me live like this. [Her naked form shivers in the snow, her hands curl around fistfuls of Kevin's clothing, not willing to let him back away, taking with him her only hope at oblivion. She is begging, shameless, helpless, hopeless.] I only ever tried to help you...

[Kevin almost scoffs outwardly at that. Help him? How? By lying to him, tricking him, revealing in this last battle that no one here in the Brotherhood had ever trusted him during his brief stay with them? By being emotionally unavailable when Kevin most needed a friend...?

He wants to say these things with a spiteful vehemence but finds that he can't. She is fully human now, with hair as black as her namesake, and pale, unscaled flesh. She has a warmth in her human eyes even though Kevin knows that nothing of the sort exists behind them.]

Raven, if this isn't your true form, then I don't know what could be more fitting. You could never be anything but a fake.

[Even as he says this, Kevin can't help pitying this shivering mess of a person at his feet. He kneels, takes off his coat, and wraps it around her, knowing she won't get up to defend herself or attack in this state.

Kevin gets back on his feet, and stares down at Raven. There's a bitter, vicious resentment brewing inside of him as a result of realizing how much he'd been used. There's so much he still needs to say.]

Edited 2011-02-26 09:13 (UTC)

[Her pleading, blue eyes never leave him, still begging, silently as he wraps his coat around her. Those shining, sky coloured orbs shed crisp, clear tears. The cold is setting into her bones now, a deep chill sending shivers along her muscles, her body tremors, even with Kevin's jacket to warm her.

She knows what lies ahead for her if she can't convince him, the cruelty, the cold and unforigiving walls of a cell in the Triskelion, eternity trapped in one body. In short: living hell.]

Please. [Her voice is singular now, there is no falsehood to it. This Raven, only Raven, the only visage left.] God, please, Wither. Kill me, Just kill me. I know you must want to...

[She clutches at him again but is cast off, almost too gently, falling back with barely a sound into the snow. She looks around at the X-men, at the Madroxes, all of them frozen, staring at her. Their fight forgotten.

She screams then, with the urgency of the gallows-bound, her trembling figure rent with the force of the the utterance, and collapses in the snow, begging, sobbing, prostrate at Kevin's feet.]

[Kevin now absently remembers the time that John told him about the first time Mystique had lost her powers. In too much shock over what happened, she could do nothing but lie on the floor speechless and broken as Magneto abandoned her. Kevin knew with certainty that the days that followed, until her powers returned, had to be the darkest of her life, worse even than any times she was ridiculed or outcast for being a mutant.

In response to her words, I know you must want to, Kevin decides to offer some honesty.]

Yeah, part of me always will. The hunger. It'll never go away. But it isn't me. Not all of me, anyway. I'm not you, Mystique.

[Kevin's voice is filled with anger, and almost hates himself for his intentional cruelty of using her mutant name, knowing that it will hurt her more than calling her Raven.]

I'm not. I'm not you. [He wonders now if he's saying this more to convince himself, or for the others listening.]

I'll always have this hunger to kill. But working to suppress it... it's just what I'm going to have to learn to do. Starting today. And you... I won't just let you die by my hand.

'SNIKT

Join the club, kid.

[From the darkness of the woods, the Wolverine emerges. His arms bare, his clothing tattered, but his eyes are sane and his movements are calm and calculated. His six extended claws are adamantium insurance that no one, X-men or Brotherhood, will interfere with his approach. There is a stillness in the air around them and the man they call Logan commands reverence for the huddled mass, the suffering that has become palpable.]

It's not the hunger that sets your place in the world, it's whether you surrender to it. [Logan's steel eyes meet Kevin's, something approving there, and he nods. He stoops, his claws retracting, to collect Mystique in his arms. Perhaps some of the mutants there have never borne witness to the Wolverine's humanity, but the express tenderness with which he cradles Raven Darkholme to his chest, the woman who has at once been his captor, tormentor, and enemy leaves no doubt that there is a kindness behind his savagery, a base affinity for those who suffer.] Maybe you feel like that means people would be better off without you. Maybe they would be. Sometimes that isn't the choice you have to make. Sometimes you have to decide whether you are better off, more human, without them.

[Logan shifts Raven's weight in his arms, stepping closer to Kevin, his short stature still somehow confrontational, commanding respect, exuding authority. If any man alive knows what it is to be a killer, an incomparable force of death, it is Logan, and his words are heavy with an intimate understanding of Kevin's plight.]

I don't think you are, Kevin. Do you?

Logan.

[Kevin won't ever really get used to Logan. He's still intimidated by the man, and flinches just ever so slightly.

Logan's words sink in and really hit hard, and Kevin almost can't think clearly about what he's said for how much weight the words carry. Instead he chooses to talk about something else.]

I'm sorry about -- before. I just thought it was the best way to keep you safe. I hope you knew.

Edited 2011-02-26 22:53 (UTC)

I knew, kid. [Logan clocks him with a look, one that is at once forgiving and admonishing and amused. As if the very thought of Kevin causing him harm is funny, regardless of how true it is.] It was a good call.

I guess we have something to focus on now, for your training. [He pauses, raising an eyebrow.] That is, if you're ready to come back.

[Kevin eyes Logan with a sort of bemused grin of his own -- clearly Logan thinks it's ridiculous that anyone could hurt him. But as invincible as he thinks he is, Kevin can't quite shake the fear he had for the old man in the moment he realized he could've really killed him. If Polaris actually did strip away his adamantium... But, no. Kevin wasn't going to think about that anymore. As far as he was concerned, from now on, the Wolverine was unkillable again. Things worked out, and Kevin was grateful. And maybe a little proud of Logan's praise.

But then... he considers Logan's question, and is surprised by how much it hurts him to finally face the music. Go back to the school? Yeah, well, if he was going to frank -- it sounds like a better life than holing up by himself wherever he can, living off his inheritance until it runs out, and then whatever else would come next. But he can't. He's only just managed to be honest enough with himself to admit that he cares about these people, and with him... well, there's just too much potential for accidents.]

Logan, I wish I could.

[It was the truth. Seems like the truth had been surfacing a lot since John's arrival, which, right now, seems like ages ago when it had only been a couple of days.]

You can.

[Logan knows that look, has worn it himself. The concern, the fear. It is a cross he will have to learn to bear if he's going to survive.]

You think the only way for you to protect the people you care about is to stay away from them, but look. [He nods towards Ali and Jono, huddled close together, their faces etched with deep lines of concern. Beyond them, John leans against a tree, looking bored.] They risked their lives coming here. You know they would do it again in a heartbeat. They would follow you, no matter how far you go or how deep into danger it leads them. They would find you, and try to bring you home. They would fight for you, because that's what it means to be part of this team.

I know it's not easy to be afraid of what you're capable of, to live with the burden of killing people you've loved, knowing one wrong move could mean doing it again. Believe me. It doesn't get easier doing it on your own, even if the risk is less, the ghosts are louder and the guilt weighs heavier without someone around to drown out the memories.

[His eyes bore into Kevin, knowing the desolation his life will be if he forsakes his friends to go it alone.]

[Now Kevin's having a really difficult time keeping his emotions in check. He glances to where Logan indicates, and sees that it's true. That Ali and Jono are looking him with uncertain, timid expressions, and Kevin has to looks down at the ground to compose himself. He's getting a little embarrassed at the fact that he has to work to keep his calm at all. Then he looks back up at Logan, and speaks firmly and confidently.]

You're right. And if that's their way of showing that they care, then my way of showing it has to be to keep my distance. I have to do this, Logan. If I stayed... it would just be selfish. I'm done being selfish. I'm doing this for them.

[And this time, Kevin truly believes it. He's been through too much, and seen so many things in a relatively short amount of time, and is done feeling sorry for himself. Done with the pity and the shame. He's glad he went through that period in his life, though, so that he can look back on it through the prism of experience and know that it's not worth the energy to feel self-pity anymore. Now he doesn't know what he wants for himself anymore -- and Logan's not helping, just making him feel more conflicted -- but he does know that he wants his friends safe. And safe means not with him.]

I appreciate what you're doing, though. [Kevin adds this softly, with less command than his previous words, and looks down as he says it, his guard down and vulnerabilities showing in the form of him forgetting to work on keeping his southern accent hidden. He sighs and wraps his sweater around him tighter as the wind blows a bit harder, and is slightly annoyed that he had to give his jacket to Mystique. Well, he isn't suffering as much as she is, so he doesn't have much to complain about, he supposes.]

[Logan notes all these small tells, the shifting of his eyes, his aversion to looking at Ali and Jono, the slip of Atlanta in his voice. He is quiet, nodding, understanding. And then he speaks, and what he says is almost a surprise, even to him.]

They were wrecks when you were gone, Ford. Blaire turned into a miserable drunk, and Starsmore would just sleep all day. I think he even cut back his eating. I'm not saying you're wrong here, kid, but they suffered more in the weeks you were gone than they ever did with you around.

Look, you don't have to make up your mind right away. [Logan hushes Mystique, his grip around her tightening as she tries to struggle in his arms. She'll have to be dealt with, and soon.] I'm driving back to the state, debrief SHIELD. I want to handle it directly. You can come, take some time to process. I won't try and make your mind up for you, but we can talk about training, about safeguards, precautions. After, if you still wanna bolt, I'll let you. Drive you wherever you want to go myself.

[Now Kevin feels the first twinges of guilt at the mention of Ali and Jono. Logan has no reason to lie -- Kevin supposes that's pretty much the truth. He has a hard time believing, though, that his old friends would break down so hard after he left. Those idiots, he thinks to himself. He figured they might be a bit upset -- perhaps guilty, even, for brushing aside his depression instead of taking it more seriously -- but a miserable drunk? Dropping everything to just sleep? It's ridiculous how they reacted. Kevin realizes... he probably had no idea how much they actually did care about him. He voices these sentiments out loud, scoffing a little and chuckling as he does so to Logan.]

Those idiots.

[And then Kevin perks up just the slightest bit at Logan's offer. It's... so tempting. Kevin actually gives it serious consideration, which could be dangerous. In the end, if the right decision is for him to leave, then delaying that decision will just make it hurt more. But maybe it's because he wants it so much that he's willing to go along with his invitation...]

I'd like that. Thanks. [Kevin addresses Logan with a clear voice again, and a calm expression, to signify his gratitude is sincere.]

[Logan nods, grunting his gruff approval. He glances over at Ali and Jono again, then past them to where Bobby and Julian are conversing tensely.]

I'll need to talk to Iceman. Sort out what to do with Raven, and the rest. Wanna get a rundown of what to expect from Frost when we get back. [He frowns, not looking forward to the White Queen's wrath. He shakes his head.] An earful at least, no doubt.

You should talk to them, Kevin. [He nods over to Ali and Jono.] Reckless idiots or not, you won't get out of here until you do. I'll come and find you when it's time to go.

Timemark 7:28 ;) Provided by Kayt.

Also, lesson in embedding YouTube videos: Make sure box labeled "use old embed code" is checked. <3

Edited 2011-02-26 14:54 (UTC)

Heeeee, yay! Thanks! This video is legendary and awesome. And SO RAVEN.

[OPEN POST] NEW BRO'HOOD

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That is so NOT Raven, guys. /laments

Re: That is so NOT Raven, guys. /laments

Kevin. Ford. <3 My Hero! (He's SO Raven!)

So is she, sort of :P hehe.

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iris